Opposite my window is my cupboard. I have a table in my room strewn with fly tying equipment and materials, it shows that I like fishing. Definitely need to work on your vocabulary and sentences as it seems to be repetitive. Then straight ahead you will see my drawers with three pukeko statues and some other items. But the spelling and use of punctuation was needed and also you could use some more descriptive words. Senses are all over the show when it comes to my room. I like the way you described it and detailed all of your ideas in paragraphs. Good description Annie. Out my window you can see a stand of poplars, some five finger leaf trees and a beige orange rhododendron (type of flower). When I left my room I had my pajamas on the floor with my beanbag in the middle of the room. It smells like fresh vanilla because of the bowl of dried petals and shells that have been smothered with air freshener. Example 1: My room is average but not like an average kids bedroom, my room is very organised where all my clothes go. Because its too big to get out the door and it sits almost in front of my door and we cant get it out and I hate it. Really good, some really good descriptive words and I could imagine it really well. This is placed flush against the left hand wall and is filled with many treasures. It has a dark theme and it has black sheets and gray covers. Above my bed are decorations and then across from my bed there is my creamy white set of draws. I enjoyed reading your writing illustrates without hesitation what your room feels and looks like. well done, BRIDGETS BEDROOM Down one side of it there are five drawers also filled with special items and on the bottom there is another drawer which is filled with gemstones. I adore my paintings and the way that they match my theme of turquoise blue. You describe it well. MY BEDROOM Examples of Popular Metaphors All the worlds a stage, and all the men and women merely players. William Shakespeare I am the good shepherdand I lay down my life for the sheep. The Bible, John 10:14-15 All our words are but crumbs that fall down from the feast of the mind.Khalil Gibran your bedroom is like the inside of your head (simile). Feed-forward - You didn't put as much detail as you should've and there was a few spelling mistakes, you need to put a bit more detail and go over it to make sure you haven't got any spelling mistakes. We have a old square tv holder thingy that I used to swing on until I put a hole in the wall, its still there. I have a lot of special objects in my bedroom. Well done though :-). Tattoo Aftercare Saniderm, There are so many aspects of my bed I love but my favorite one would have to how comfortable it is. My bed is nearly always made. It is my favourite part of my house because I can do what I like in there, and yet not get disturbed. The material on this site can not be reproduced, distributed, transmitted, cached or otherwise used, except with prior written permission of Multiply. Create your own unique website with customizable templates. Everyday Life Metaphors. Then there's my desk covered in books, pens and rubbish along with my PJs and sports gear spread everywhere . The fresh air circulates the room which gives me a sense of new and relaxation. Jordan Papalia Baby, I have food wrappers on the floor beside my bed. My king single bed is jammed in the right hand corner with my beside table just beside it and underneath my window. Sen. Lindsey Graham cruises to reelection in S.C. Hickenlooper beats Gardner for Colo. Senate seat, 'Hamilton' star changes lyrics of song for voters, Trump signals he won't try to declare victory prematurely, Ex-NBA star Eddie Johnson dies at 65 in prison, Expert: A Biden win could lead to mask mandate, testing, Clothing items that may get you turned away from the polls, Jerry Jones: DiNucci's 1st NFL start was 'a lot for him', How Georgias blue drift changes politics nationwide, Battle intensifies over which votes will count. Your ideas are relevant Alex, you have described what it looks well. Beside that there is my mini bookcase that is full of unread books, over from that there is my wardrobe full of junk and extra clothes. I hope you can imagine my very much loved bedroom in your mind as if you're there at my house. For next time you could use more vocabulary and try not to repeat words. It's very clean and healthy room,well it wouldnt be clean without my mother, of course, sometimes you just need her to boss you around. I like the colours, the decorations, the flooring, the view of the farm and most of all my cosy bed. 4, I like how you describe where the objects in your room where. So over all the 4 main things that i love about my room are style , layout ,accessories and furniture. There is a mirror hanging on my off white walls above a small table. Love reading your stories as always! 4+. Islas Bedroom Description But sometimes it doesn't stay clean. It is literally a big, black dust nursery because its elevated to nearly touching the roof and Im short. My walls are a creamy white color they fit very well with my room. I am lucky as the sunlight peeks over the fence and smothers my walls with a bright, warm glow. In the left corner when you walk in is a stack of books, a few being written in swedish. I would give you a rubric R4 mark. Creamy brown and soft those are just few words I would use to describe my carpet it is great for my hard feet. must suck cock. Be good to keep the clothes off the floor! So in conclusion I think my bedroom has a good layout, colors, furniture and style and I like it a lot and so does Jackson. My duvet has white and pink checkers on it, ontop of that I have a small blue blanket with symmetrical squares on it. My desk Accessories are cool , funky and a little bit expensive but all of these different accessories just add to make my bed room mine. In my room we have really ugly wall paper, it is green and white, but ugly green. To say your home is a safety blanket is to relate it to the characteristics of safety blankets: they make you feel comforted, safe, and protected from the world. Overall I love my room to pieces because it belongs to me. In my personal opinion I do love the way my bedroom looks and how it has a theme and a great view! Every morning I need to make sure my bed is neat and tidy. My bedroom layout includes two sets of windows, both made with with grey aluminium and double glazed glass. On the floor you may notice a creamy carpet that barely shows its face when it's covered in soft furnishings i.e. I loved the way you described your bedroom at the start, I had a good visualization of what your room looked like. Poor thing, your hands are as cold as ice! Your capital letters are really good. However there is only one change I can offer, that is a change of colour to a blue or a nice green, maybe even a feature wall. What Type Of Muzzleloading Firearm Is The Most Popular And Most Commonly Used Among Hunters Today?, The tabletop itself is dusty with dried gum and I think even an empty skittles packet. The ceilings are high and have a wooden trim around the perimeter of the room. Required fields are marked *. Your story was very descriptive and had good describing words. In my room it echos and to counter that I put up a couple posters in my room. Now let me take you on a virtual journey of my own bedroom. My walls are plain white and the carpet is a nice, soft contrasting dark colour. I think my bedroom is perfect my way because of the colors, layout and the design. I thought you could have added more adjectives to describe the objects you talked about (such as the Lego and drums) but I loved how you used words such as wade instead of walk, avalanche instead of fall and navigate instead of look/travel. It is filled with many happy memories, prayers, fights with myself and resolutions. Its nice to get up to something like that. But one thing that you could work on with your punctuation is how much you used. Thorntons Bedroom Description Next to my bed is a deyou miterfire. Lots of vivid detail and descriptions Piper! My curtains are white with a see through sort of material over top. Sophies Bedroom The thing i treasure is my lego bin because it contains my cool creations. There are also some capital letters that are in the wrong place. Quite a few good words but a lot of bland words in your writing making it a bit boring. I really liked that you used some really great words that have me hooked in. You have accurately described the chaos that is your room - however you didn't mention how many times a week I ask you and your brother to tidy the mess up! Most of the punctuation was good but there were a few mistakes like writing the word twice. I could imagine looking at the things you described. Now you should have a pretty good idea of what my bedroom looks like. The colouring is a dark grey frame with translucent drawers. A few more sensory descriptions of your room maybe but we would happily rate you 4+. It has creamy vanilla wallpaper with 2 rose red chandeliers that hang of the corners of my room. My half of the bedroom is on the east side of the house, meaning that Im directly in front of one of our three gardens. What a great description of your beautiful bedroom! But with all that there are some amazing bonuses like awesome modern day accessories and how amazingly clean it is! So try using better descriptive words. Secondly are my accessories I have many accessories in my room but there is three that stand out to me my PS4, tv and Headset. Your writing was exactly as I remember it. Good work I don't think you need to improve. Well done, I can tell you put a lot of effort into it. With the pastel colours and gold coloured curtains, it gives the room a lot of light. I like my bedroom just the way it is. It fits my school clothes, jerseys and other stuff. I also have a pin board where I can pin on some memories, art and events to come. But when you're the oldest the youngest gets your room when you move out and it usually the best room in the house. I am fond of the fact that it is my own place, and that everything is just right. My room has a lot of sport contents. Great writing. Some of its correct. There's really not much sound in my room at all, it's quiet and if you're lucky you can hear the animals outside. as your room! Layout in my room is great I really like it. Chargers, Polaroid, medals and cards are a big part of my accessories. There are no dirty cloths on the floor, no rubbish on the floor. In my room I have a cactus and a succulent plant on my bedside table. Well I think it's there to get a good view of our old house, right next door! It is a very modern bedroom, with a tropical theme. When you walk into my room youll see my bed in the far right corner. Very well detailed with accessories and colours. And I have also got speakers, lunch boxes, books, trophies, trays, tech projects and other things. Usually before I go to bed there is a glass of water and the book Im reading. I hate tidying my room but this is something that needs to be done more often. On the floor there is all my stuff for my I-Pod and I-Phone like my charger and headphones which are plain white and usually tangled up. I strolled down the hallway to my room on the right. My lamp is blue with a very bright light. Great work Joel! My bedroom is exactly the way I like it and can tell you a story about my personality, if you read on you will know about my personality and go for a virtual journey through my bedroom. You just need to open up your curtains more to get the better light. I use my bedroom to sleep, relax and sometimes do my homework. Even my parents say it is ugly. The cleanliness of my bedroom is pretty good, but sometimes my football gear is left outside my wardrobe on the floor. On the far side of my room is an old desk that needs getting rid of because all it does is collect dust. I have to admit though mum doesn't like the amount of time I spend in it. When you walk through the door and look left you will see my desk and chair. I like how big my room is because its a good size for me to just lay on the ground and play on my devices or read. I would say that the smell of my bedroom is like a warm summers day and it looks like a warm summers day too. In my bed room the layout, cleanliness, colors and accessories are the most important things that makes my bedroom that makes it mine. You could make some ideas paragraphs a bit longer. My duchess is across from my bed flat against the left hand wall. Above my bed there are another three picture that my mum had embroidered for us when we were little. The dark side. Also two comfy blue headphones and it's sound is great as well I have had this for a few months now. My bedroom, a place of comfort and rest. Thanks to those paintings my room has some colour. Its so messy that you think if you close one eye and squint, you might have thought you were at the dump yard. Next to that is a deceptive worktop. There is also a built in wardrobe on the opposite wall to the window, above it there is a picture of a mint green kombi van. My walls are a light gray with light gray carpet but also my sheets on my bed are gray as well. you could add more expression in your writing next time. I have white walls and chocolate brown curtains. I also love my reading area and the way that my half of the of my bedroom gets most of the sun. There is a leather chest that I dump all my clothes on, and a bunch of tools and motorbike gear in the gray shelving unit. The pencils are mostly sharp, pointy ready to be used. Ray Davies Natalie Ray Hynde, I love my room because it's mine. At the back of my room there is a large window exposing the magnificent mountains covered in a blanket of snow, my other window gives a happy view of a fence which we share with our neighbour. The size of my bedroom is actually the right size. I think your writing has really improved this year. The other decoration in bedroom is my average size mirror which has lots of writing on it so I can remember what I need to do. You walk into my room and pop! So my layout might be tight, but it works for me. My bedroom is in the end garage with the laundry in it. And I would try and keep it a bit more tidy! They are covered in all kinds of hangings that make the room mine. There is a massive window in front of you as you walk into my bedroom. This final piece of text will be explaining the lighting. The tv, my tv is a black 32 inch philips tv which is about 9 years old but It's still works good. People drive around the neighborhoods to see the beautiful houses lit up. It looks good with all the light colours fitted into my room, and with the dark blankets covering my bed. My room has many accessories, there is pictures, paintings, plants and other things too. My bed with its wooden stand is quite tall but I dont mind it that way. I like spending time in my room, because I like having my own space and its a good place to be by myself. Great writing. Lv 7. Its unique to me because its my room and I like it the way it is. You used the write amount of good words in the right places. My room is the smallest in the house but I love my room just the way it is. On Sams desk, which is to the left of his bed and bedside table, sits a monitor, which plugs into a PS4, and quite a dusty one, mind you. I my room there is lots of colours all around it. Good job, I like how you described your basketball posters. I don't think you've left out a single thing about your room :), This sounds like the room I have been in there is lots of detail.The ending paragraph is great to end the description, This sounds very descriptive. She has described most of the furnishings. I didn't find any spelling errors, but there was a mistake where there was no space between a full stop and the start of a sentence in paragraph 3. But I don't even know why the window is there in the first place! There is clothes such as shirts and shorts mixed in with stuffed toys and shoes. Glider Tow Pilot Jobs Arizona, Feed-forward - I can't think of anything bad about this (For this category at least) great job! It use to be an old garage but was renovated into a bedroom that Im proud to call it mine. Above my bed are two medium sized paintings, one of an owl and the other of a tree. Excellent punctuation and spelling. Because if you dont and try wade through all the clothes spread out and risk breaking your leg or ankle on toy cars or getting bits of lego stuck between your toes. The floor is usually covered in clothes and rubbish. Their should be a comma after hallway in the first sentence, and I am also confused on why in your last paragraph you started off with firstly. My room is filled with colours I love like yellow, green and BLUE. (My hands feel very cold.) Im going to tell you four things about my room, the layout, accessories, colours and finally the style of the room. People say their home Use adjectives. My bedroom. Well structured paragraphs and a few funny jokes too. I bet your glad to get out of your old room. The relaxation of leaping onto it at the end of the day is basically the same as reading a extremely tired baby a lullaby. Its normally just a mucked up pile of sheets and she is always nagging me to make my bed and or clean my room. Well done!!! My turquoise blanket has a delicate touch, so fluffy you want to take it everywhere. Nicely described George, your room is currently a blank canvas so you can do a lot with it. I have heaps of ski gear but I dont really have anywhere to put it so even if I do clean my room, my ski gear normally stays on the floor. Then let's go on this virtual tour of my bedroom. Im at home in the forest uses those associations we have of home (comfort, relaxation) and apply them to the outdoors. Troy you have used some good vocab. But it was good. I have separated the metaphors on this page into two lists. It was a great story. Metaphor Examples for Intermediate Readers The slashes indicate line breaks. But there is always room for throwing down pillows as a carpet you will never know unless you try. It is facing the East, which means that in the morning you can see the sunrise from my window. My bedroom is very tidy. Beware of the wardrobe if you go underneath it something is bound to fall on your head or all my stuff will avalanche out. Emma's bedroom. What I would really like though is some more storage because there is not a lot of space to put my belongings. The only thing thats in there is a couple of dresses I never wear and some picture frames that my mum forgot to take out when she moved rooms. now I will tell you about the hard wood of my dutchess, my duchess is dark wood it has lots of junk on top of it such as my watch some books a photo that's framed and a lot more. The cushions on my bed are very soft and have a sponge texture. Your punctuation is really good, but you are missing a few commas and had some capital letters missing. Luckily for me I dont have much to tidy, unlike my brother. It is in the box still from when I got it and Its awesome. There are three brass coloured wall lamps scattered around the room that have been pulled out their sockets and painted under, there are small clusters of hooks and hangers ready for decoration like a wonderful poster and a few of my creations from school. Did you use a dictionary?If not Excellent spelling. MY BEDROOM! In the corner on one side there is a small mirror and above it a poster of my name, that reminds me who I am everyday when I see it. Under the small window is my bed and to the left of the bed is my small bedside table with my grey shaded lamp on top. Over all I think she has done very good. 3-. The place I can get away from my sister and other hassles, a place where I have some good things, my bedroom. Its a big room, but when shared and halved, the stomping grounds are rather small, which also means little mess in little space looks like big mess. It might not seem like your average 13 year old bedroom because really this bedroom wasn't even for me, it was meant to be a spare room. Dotted around my room are a bunch of different things. The cast on JAMES BEDROOM Your lucky that it's big haha 4. There is a big black shoebox beside my bed which fits all my shoes in it. I personally love my bedroom. My bed. I would love to change my bed to a queen bed though. The view of my room is amazing because when I look out of my window I see my whole farm I can see our cows I can see our cowshed and the sun rise. Then, you can say your home is a zoo (or a swamp or a classroom, or whatever!) With blue sheets on it and a big pink and blue duvet. My favourite rooms is my bedroom. I love this painting because of the colours and the way the artist has paid attention to detail. William I liked your descriptive words and the structure of your paragraphs. 3, Ha ha he was very honest about how messy his room is, it was an accurate description. My bedroom is the coldest room in the whole house I wake up with a wet floor because of where it sits. Everything in my bedroom is a similar colour and I love the look of my bedroom when you walk into it. I think you edited the grammar well with making it make sense but there were a few spelling mistakes and no capitals for I NSL: be more bold with good words to catch the readers attention and to take them on a journey. Old knick knacks made of glass and metal dotted around to add a more homely feel. I have a blue stegosaurus lampshade, a monitor and PS4, a TV and even a bulletin board. It gives a very accurate picture of Sophie's room. My room has a fresh air smell and, in the morning you can hear the birds chirping outside, if you were to walk into my room it would be clean and tidy just the way I like it. My pillow has different coloured stripes on it and it is very soft and comfy. Expand on your punctuation so your not using the classics to much. Writers usually describe the setting at the very start of a story. On the other side of the room is my chair with my blanket that fades from blue to white. Well described - good use of descriptive words. My wall color is a nice light sea blue color I wouldn't change anything about it. I think you have used some good verbs to describe your room and it has lots of information. I run to my room, upstairs on the left i jump onto my bed yes schools over I think to myself. (She is a nice.) My layout, it isn't the most complex layout but if you say it 5 times it's definitely complex. You have elaborated on your ideas and have given the reader evidence why it is like that. But all of this is because the entire house is new, in fact it's not even finished!, although with all these bonuses I don't go into my bedroom that often. The pots I put my plants in are made out of clay and my photo frames are made out of glass. The cleanliness of my room is great but with a small amount of clothes on the ground. I like to walk around barefoot because the carpet tickles my feet and sinks into my toes. JESS'S BEDROOM DESCRIPTION I would give you a 3. I understand why mum doesn't like me being in my room too much. The best part of my room is the furniture and layout. This description is on how my room looks now with the layout, accessories, furniture and colours. Your writing paints a picture in the readers mind and leaves them feeling like they actually just physically walked around it! It has a very spacious drawer that pulls out from underneath. The walls have a paint swirl on it that comes off the wall about 5 cm and it looks awesome! sleeps in my room. You can see my chook shed and the house paddock with a woolshed at the back of it. Next time try used some words less for example the word 'and'. But some of the stuff in my room is going to sold so I can make more space. This is the first year ive had my own room, and I love having it. I liked your ideas, you thought of ideas then typed in down on your google doc. Virgo Descendant: Personality Traits and Compatibility, Taurus Descendant: Personality Traits and Compatibility, Scorpio Descendant: Personality Traits and Compatibility. Maybe because it has two duvets on it and the sun is shining on it. So I think that I don't really have a style because it just a bit of everything some old stuff and some new stuff. There is just the right amount of furniture in my room and it isnt too full or empty. Beneath the mountain is a variety of my calves running in the evening sun. Well done. I have a black carpet with a white lines diagonally going through it. How my room feels. You used interesting words that I haven't heard of before. What Type Of Muzzleloading Firearm Is The Most Popular And Most Commonly Used Among Hunters Today? There is a famous song with the line Home is wherever Im with you. Above my desk there is my mini basketball hoop with my mini basketball in it. JESSIES BEDROOM. It holds over 40 books as well as countless keepsakes, wires and old toys. I have a built in wardrobe that has shelves in it where I can store my belongings. My desk is a white desk and is placed against the back of the room to give a feeling that the colors are spaced out. These windows also include a door, that leads out into one of three gardens at my house. Next time read through it and really think about what word could fit in there that will work even better. I have some great accessories in my room that can give you a story about my personality. But good over all, Shadyn this is an accurate explanation of your teenage boy's bedroom. 10 similes to describe a place. My bed takes up about one quarter of my room and is stationed next to the northern wall of my room. Big books and small books. You had very descriptive vocabulary and there was a lot of adjectives and that made it very interesting. Really good writing, I can picture your room very clearly. My bedroom is in the middle of two other bedrooms. You used some great vocabulary like chaos, but there were a few places that you could of used a better word than the one you did use. It lies to the left of the monitor on the desk and is covered with old homework and empty cups. Your full stops and capital letters are very good. The polaroid camera doesn't have anywhere else to go so it just sits on my desk. great work i love that you did good punctuation and it was a good story.
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